WHEN RESOLVING ISSUES

MEMORY VERSE: Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things. Philippians 4:8

BIBLE IN ONE YEAR: 1 Kings 14-18

Misunderstandings are inevitable in human relationships. When they occur, those involved should seek to resolve it as soon as possible. When the people involved sit to resolve the issue, they must be solution-focused. They must seek to save and strengthen the relationship not bring the other party down or make them feel guilty. The conversation should be geared not at apportioning blames. Only words that will build each other up according to their needs should be used. Ephesians 4:29 says, “Let no corrupt communication proceed out of your mouth, but that which is good to the use of edifying, that it may minister grace unto the hearers.” Also, those involved should try to understand what the other person needs.The parties involved must resist the temptation to bring up previously confessed offences; drag up other people in; use wisecracks about people’s weight, height, colour, IQ, physical, mental and emotional limitations; or bring up totally unrelated things that could cloud the issue. All these keep one from finding a solution. Shouting or raising one’s voice in order to intimidate and manipulate other party is a no no.

Whilst trying to resolve a misunderstanding, the individuals involved must seek a solution not a ‘victory’. Calling each other names and ‘diagnosing’ others only make things worse. The focus should not be on what the other person did or what the other person did not do, but on what you can do together to resolve it. The individuals involved should admit their own flaws- where they went wrong, and ask forgiveness immediately. It takes two to tango , acknowledging our own imperfections makes it easier for someone else to acknowledge theirs. Every time you take a “swing” at someone, offer them a positive “stroke”. Philippians 4:8 says, “Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things.” For each of the difficulties addressed, a compliment must be given. A good one could be, “I am sure this wasn’t easy for to you hear. Thanks for listening to me so graciously.” Being solution-focused gives people something to live up to, not down to!

NOTE: Trying to score points off each other does not help resolve issues. Allowing each other to make their points without being interrupted is very good.

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Bro Samuel | Reaching the world for Jesus.

KEEP YOUR HEART WITH ALL DILLIGENCE

 MEMORISE: Keep thy heart with all diligence; for out of it are all the issues of life. Proverbs 4:23

BIBLE IN ONE YEAR: Psalms 119:145 - 152, Proverbs 31:12, 1 Corinthians 13: 4-8

BIBLE STUDIES: Matthew 13:18-23

Why do we keep our bin bags outside our homes – without the fear of it been stolen or anything – and our mobile phones, laptops, Ipads – inside our homes? Why do people pay a lot of money to keep documents in bank vaults and cast their broken TV outside their homes? Why do we insure our cars and do not insure our wastes? It is simple. We keep our mobile phones/laptops/Ipads with all diligence because they valuable to us and throw our bin bags outside because they are of no value.  People keep documents in bank vaults because the information in those documents is worth something but they throw their broken TV outside – for the bin collectors to pick them – because they are worth nothing. Friend, we insure our cars and properties because they are useful to us and as such, we want to be able to replace them in case they are damaged or destroyed but no one insures his or her waste because it is useless.

Proverbs 4:23 says, “Keep thy heart with all diligence; for out of it are all the issues of life.” The moment we hear the word ‘keep,’ words like - ‘valuables,’ ‘useful,’ ‘important’ and their synonyms, comes to mind. The heart of man can be compared to a soil (Matthew 13:18-23). Whatever you plant in it –good thoughts or bad thoughts, hatred or love - will germinate and bear fruits. If you leave it unattended to, weeds –destructive thoughts - will start to grow in it. Why do you need to keep your heart with all diligence? There are a lot of reasons why you need to keep your heart with all diligence but we will look at two. Firstly, you need to keep your heart with all diligence because according to Proverbs 4:23, out of it flows the issues of life. Proverbs 23:7 says,” for as he thinketh in his heart, so is he: Eat and drink, saith he to thee; but his heart is not with thee.” I read this from somewhere and I will like to share it with you. “Watch your thoughts, for they become words. Watch your words, for they become actions. Watch your actions, for they become your habits. Watch your habits, for they become your character. Watch your character, for they become your destiny.” In a nutshell, you are the sum total of your thoughts. Your thoughts inform your speech. Your thought dictates your action. Your thoughts determine your mood. Your thought will define the direction of your life. Secondly, you need to keep your heart because there is someone who desperately wants to take possession of it. The person is Satan. He wants access to your heart because he knows that once he gets it, you are finished. He wants to sell some lies to you. He wants you to believe that you are a failure. He wants you to believe that there is no God. He wants to put fear inside you so that your faith will disappear and you displease God. As such, you need to keep it with all diligence so that he does not gain access into it. The moment he gains access into it, he will start to direct your life. The enemy is always looking for access and he gains access mostly when we are down or facing challenges. This is why you must never stop meditating on the word of God. This is why you must be careful who you discuss things with.

CONFESSION: I reject every evil thought in the name of Jesus.

PRAYER POINT:  I purge my heart of every destructive thought in the name of Jesus.

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Bro Samuel | Reaching the world for Jesus.